It is weighing heavily on my mind.  Obviously.  Otherwise I would be talking about other things.  Writing different posts.

It has weighed heavily on my mind for the last almost 12 years.  Ever since I graduated from college.  And realized that I was going to have to fit into a cute wedding dress that I had bought two sizes too small, "knowing" I could do the work to fit into the dress.

I didn't.  We sold that dress in a consignment shop.  And found a new one in a consignment shop too.  Luckily, it was one that "fit" my personality better.  And my body too, I guess.

What will I do once all of this weight is off?  I worry that is why I am constantly struggling.  I am afraid of the "real" me.  I have been consumed with trying to lose weight, be more healthy, essentially changing myself for the last TWELVE years.

Who is the real me?

I should be excited about finding out.  But, instead it makes me a bit nervous.

What if I don't like that woman who doesn't have to worry about her weight?

Scratch that...I am always going to have to worry about weight...but that woman who doesn't have to worry if there is a "plus size" section in that store.  That doesn't have to worry that the airplane seatbelt will fit her on that new airline she is traveling on.

I will find the real me.  {And through the plans of the Maker, I know it will be a good me.}

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Photo {since I had to take a photo of a photo} and words in brackets added after the five minutes.

On my way to see what other bloggers have posted at The Gypsy Mama for Five Minute Friday.  Where you write, with no editing, for five minutes.  Genius, right?


Tracey Davis said...

The real you is just going to be an enhanced version of the old you. Funny, chill, artistic, patient, kind, and SMOKIN HOT. Can I come visit now?

Mary said...

I totally get where you are coming from, I've been walking beside you ~ thanks for sharing...

Pam said...

Thank you for a great post. I had so often had these very same thoughts and feelings.

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